“When’s Jan Zelezny going to throw?” asked William Shakespeare.
“He’s not,” replied Sophie Ellis-Bextor.
Shakespeare’s face fell. “I don’t understand,” he said.
“Well, he’s retired,” said Ellis-Bextor. “He’s not in the competition.”
“But why?” said Shakespeare, trying to turn in his seat, but struggling due to his ridiculously oversized breeches.
“Well he’s old,” said Ellis-Bextor. “He got old and retired.”
“I don’t understand,” said Shakespeare.
Ellis-Bextor was growing irritated. “What’s not to understand?” she snapped. “Sportsmen retire.”
“Why would Jan Zelezny not be throwing the javelin in the Olympic Games?”
“Because he’s retired,” whined Ellis-Bextor. “He hasn’t competed in years.”
“That’s ridiculous,” said Shakespeare.
Ellis-Bextor didn’t respond.
“Do you think they’d let me have a go?” said Shakespeare.
Ellis-Bextor again didn’t respond.
“I miss Jan Zelezny,” said Shakespeare sadly.
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